Monday, May 25, 2009

Monologue Monday - Achewood by Chris Onstad

This Monologue Monday is a little different. It's not from a play, but from a webcomic by the name of Achewood. I'll be honest, I'm not generally a fan of Achewood. But, when I saw the following, I knew there was something to it. I've been told that I shouldn't use the monologue, because I'm not one who typically plays uneducated. I need to keep my mouth open more...

But, anyway, if I don't use it, perhaps you will, blogfriend!


Look, dude. I pay my bills. I ain't got pregnancies all over town. Where you get off actin' like I got to get up at six AM and eat a damn garbanzo bean? In fact, you know what? Screw you and all the rest of your self-righteous, "I-get-up-early" types! "Oooh, look at meeeee. I'm so raaad. I know what the gaaarbagemen look like." All my life I been gettin' shit for the hours I keep. I ain't understand why gettin' up early is so goddamned great. --- Yeah, I get that folks leave for work at seven 'cause we ain't used to have light bulbs at night, but it's been like a hundred damn years. I don't know, Pat. Maybe I'm progressive, but maybe, also you're old-fashioned, like all knowin' what it looks like for a horse to go to the bathroom start-to-finish. I ain't sure, but I'm almost sure, and the man who invented the future barely ever even had that.


From the comic The Farm Has a Nickname For Its Rooster.

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More updates later. The tumult in my life isn't exactly letting up. When I have something good to talk about, mark my words...you will be the first to know, blogfriend.

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